DILF

Listen... I literally dream of being one of those people who wake up with good skin, crave working out, who juice, have waistlines, and can hang out in a social situation and have "one drink" -HOWEVER, here I am: a swamp demon, sloppy mess, that takes a lot of time to get ready just to be told "you look tired" -but I this is who I am, and that is what I have to work with, and I am doing the best I can with that.
You wanna know why I look so tired? -Because I fucking am. I am a single dad, I work a full-time job, hustle countless [other] freelance jobs, go to the gym, diet, keep up an insane social schedule (and the Kardashians) all to put food in my daughters bowl, dress her in frilly puppy clothes, and attempting to be the best dog DILF on this side of Sunset Blvd. Ironic how I feel like I am running around in circles, and yet [still] gaining weight. Age and genetics aren’t working in my favor, but I am [working].

With all things considered things could be worse. I don't have a tribal tattoo. I have Gucci sweatpants. -And Sophie is pretty damn cute. -And really that’s all that matters.